Positive about Scripture: Positive about Equal Marriage

Many of the discussions I have been involved in about ‘Equal Marriage’ have come up against the assumption that those who believe that same sex relationships can be part of God’s purpose for gay men and women have abandoned their belief in the Bible’s authority.

Of course that can be the way some have developed in their theology but I believe that a fresh understanding of the breadth of marriage can also arise from a deeper view of the Bible’s authority over our lives. This blog summarises the approach I have taken when speaking in various contexts on this issue.

Many evangelicals, in particular, base their approach on an understanding of propositional revelation; in short, that the Bible has one meaning and that the will of God can be read off from the pages of Scripture so that there is a correct answer to all major questions of ethics. Over the years many of us add a deeper and more nuanced understanding to this starting point.

For me a major influence has been the approach of the American theologian, Stanley Hauerwas, and his championing of Narrative Theology. This reminds us that the Bible is first and foremost a story, the story of God’s involvement with humanity. It is the story which provides the framework for the whole of our understanding and way of life. Its authority is transformative, not just in the truths it reveals at first glance, but in the way it invites us to inhabit the story and discover its life transforming power in our daily lives. As God’s story it has the power to change and direct all that we are and do.

Narrative theology asks that we take time to inhabit the story; to leave the story as story as it does its work with the people of God today. We will not too quickly form ethical conclusions and moral rules which apply to all people for all time. We are prepared to stand back awhile and see how God’s story is inviting us to live now. It is clear to us from the story that God deals with the followers of Christ in different ways and provides appropriately for the forgiveness, wellbeing and flourishing of humanity at different times and in different places. And when by God’s Spirit we recognize and accept our place in the story we act on the truth it has given us.

I am also indebted to the approach of Walter Brueggemman who counsels us to believe that there is often more than one appropriate answer to an issue when we consider a particular verse or passage of the Bible. He criticizes ‘the pervasive Western, Christian propensity to flatten, to refuse ambiguity, to lose density, and to give universalizing closure… Classical Western theological discourse, wants to overcome all ambiguity and give closure in the interest of certitude (‘Theology of the Old Testament’ 1997, page 81 & 82).

To consider a passage broadly before asserting the definitive position and to live with the various possibilities of the story adds a greater degree of humility to our theology. We believe in the authority and power of the scriptures no less, and we are cautious not to use an all-too-certain interpretation of a Bible verse or passage as a way of exercising power over others. Many people, and in particular our LGBT brothers and sisters have often experienced being silenced and excluded by a lack of such an approach. The use of the six or so verses in the Bible, which in some way or another refer to same-sex activity, can be experienced as one group of Christians exercising power over them and forbidding to them what God wills for the whole of humanity.

Embracing this narrative approach as part of the transformative power of the Bible means that we notice many of our fellow human beings inhabiting God’s story differently from ourselves. I am therefore careful not too quickly to censor or criticize another Christian who has arrived at a different way of following Christ. At any given time, I may be wrong, or they may be wrong, but we may both be right! This approach fosters a more generous approach - in line with our all generous God

Application to Equal Marriage

Is there some way in which we can understand how an LGBT person may inhabit the bible’s stories and hear God slightly differently from the rest of us? Is it possible that there are several contrasting stories, or different interpretations of the same story – rather than a point blank, ‘Thou shalt not…’? As one indication of how I have approached the question of equal marriage I reflect on the creation story in Genesis 2.

Some words written by a gay friend of mine set the context of how he may well read this particular bible story: ‘We are all created by God to be who we are, including gays and lesbians. It’s just as natural and spiritually correct to be gay as it is to be left-handed.’ Such a statement abbreviates all the debates about ‘nature or nurture’ and the respective balance between the two - probably different in different people. But most churches will have some, maybe quite a few LGBT individuals or couples who live in a society where it is fully legal for them to be married to one of their own sex. Some of these will feel called to remain single as their way of following Christ, but some will wish to live in a faithful loving intimate relationship as part of how they live out their Christian discipleship.  

My gay friends and I both read the same bible and are called to inhabit the same stories. As we approach the paradigmatic story in Genesis 2 which describes the wonder of discovering our life’s partner, we both feel drawn to the divine announcement, ‘It is not good that the man should be alone.’ Central to the story is the need to find a life partner who will be fully suitable to the needs of both and sustain them as they leave the parental home and launch out on life together. At first there comes the almost comical process of looking around at different possible partners -  and for some of us that can take a long time in reality, though all the ‘possibles’ in our list will be human! Then as I walk in the garden and am presented with this range of possible partners – as was Adam – I am unsatisfied until I see the other human being – the one who became my wife – and I exclaim, ‘this at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh!’ As von Rad writes of this moment, ‘Now God himself, like the father of the bride, leads the woman to the man. The man in supreme joy at once recognizes the new creature as one belonging completely to him.’ (Genesis. London.1972. p.84) For me, and for most others I know this encounter has been one of the most thrilling of all life’s discoveries.

The main point of this story is finding someone who is equal to our needs, the same as me, not someone who is different (like the animals) but of the same stuff as Adam. The animals will not do - because they are different. For most of us this deepest fulfilment will be in a human being of the opposite sex – but that is not so for all….

Furthermore, this portion of scripture is such an important and powerful story that it must not merely be reduced into a universal moral code or an immutable set of ethical rules. It must also be allowed to speak afresh to us as story. However, the uncomfortable truth is that LGBT people usually hear interpretations of this story that say – ‘This is not for you; this is forbidden’

But for a moment allow a gay Christian man to inhabit the story. In terms of narrative theology, a gay person is there in the garden asking God to find a partner for him who is fully equal to his needs. He wishes to discover mutual support that will sustain them both as a couple through the whole of their life’s journey together and with God. As God presents various possible partners to him – as in the original drama - he sees all of these as inadequate for his deepest needs. He does not recognize one who will be a soul mate in whom depths of sexual intimacy can be found. Various young women are presented to him and, though he wants to be friends they do not awaken in him that deep recognition that here is one who is his partner for life. Then after a while a man is presented to him. There is a different level of recognition and response. This for him is the beginnings of what he has been longing for and he exclaims, 'This at last is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh!’ They can become one.

My hope and prayer is that more and more people will see that there is more than one way to inhabit God’s story in the Bible. As this happens many more will be asking the church to interpret its understanding of marriage in a fully inclusive way - or at the very least hoping that others who disagree will allow blessings of same sex marriages. They will hope that the church will accept a diversity of practice - leaving two contrasting stories/interpretations on the table to allow the dialogue to continue. 

I see this approach as ‘generous orthodoxy’. It enables the Church to offer God’s blessing to all couples who wish to make a faithful life-long commitment in love to one another. It gives us a gospel that proclaims God’s love equally to all.