Many of the discussions I have been involved in
about ‘Equal Marriage’ have come up against the assumption that those who
believe that same sex relationships can be part of God’s purpose for gay men
and women have abandoned their belief in the Bible’s authority.
Of course that can be the way some have developed
in their theology but I believe that a fresh understanding of the breadth of
marriage can also arise from a deeper view of the Bible’s authority over our lives.
This blog summarises the approach I have taken when speaking in various
contexts on this issue.
Many evangelicals, in particular, base their
approach on an understanding of propositional revelation; in short, that the
Bible has one meaning and that the will of God can be read off from the pages
of Scripture so that there is a correct answer to all major questions of
ethics. Over the years many of us add a deeper and more nuanced understanding
to this starting point.
For me a major influence has been the approach of
the American theologian, Stanley Hauerwas, and his championing of Narrative
Theology. This reminds us that the Bible is first and foremost a story, the
story of God’s involvement with humanity. It is the story which provides
the framework for the whole of our understanding and way of life. Its authority
is transformative, not just in the truths it reveals at first glance, but in
the way it invites us to inhabit the story and discover its life transforming
power in our daily lives. As God’s story it has the power to change and direct
all that we are and do.
Narrative theology asks that we take time to inhabit the
story; to leave the story as story as it does its work with the people of God
today. We will not too quickly form ethical conclusions and moral rules which
apply to all people for all time. We are prepared to stand back awhile and see
how God’s story is inviting us to live now. It is clear to us from the story
that God deals with the followers of Christ in different ways and provides
appropriately for the forgiveness, wellbeing and flourishing of humanity at
different times and in different places. And when by God’s Spirit we recognize
and accept our place in the story we act on the truth it has given us.
I am also indebted to the approach of Walter Brueggemman who counsels
us to believe that there is often more than one appropriate answer to an issue
when we consider a particular verse or passage of the Bible. He criticizes ‘the
pervasive Western, Christian propensity to flatten, to refuse ambiguity, to
lose density, and to give universalizing closure… Classical Western theological
discourse, wants to overcome all ambiguity and give closure in the interest of
certitude (‘Theology of the Old Testament’ 1997, page 81 & 82).
To consider a passage broadly before asserting the definitive
position and to live with the various possibilities of the story adds a greater
degree of humility to our theology. We believe in the authority and power of
the scriptures no less, and we are cautious not to use an all-too-certain
interpretation of a Bible verse or passage as a way of exercising power over
others. Many people, and in particular our LGBT brothers and sisters have often
experienced being silenced and excluded by a lack of such an approach. The use
of the six or so verses in the Bible, which in some way or another refer to
same-sex activity, can be experienced as one group of Christians exercising
power over them and forbidding to them what God wills for the whole of
humanity.
Embracing this narrative approach as part of the
transformative power of the Bible means that we notice many of our fellow human
beings inhabiting God’s story differently from ourselves. I am therefore
careful not too quickly to censor or criticize another Christian who has
arrived at a different way of following Christ. At any given time, I may be
wrong, or they may be wrong, but we may both be right! This
approach fosters a more generous approach - in line with our all generous God
Application to Equal Marriage
Is there some way in which
we can understand how an LGBT person may inhabit the bible’s stories and hear God
slightly differently from the rest of us? Is it possible that there are several
contrasting stories, or different interpretations of the same story – rather
than a point blank, ‘Thou shalt not…’? As one indication of how I have
approached the question of equal marriage I reflect on the creation story in
Genesis 2.
Some words written by a
gay friend of mine set the context of how he may well read this particular bible
story: ‘We
are all created by God to be who we are, including gays and lesbians. It’s just
as natural and spiritually correct to be gay as it is to be left-handed.’ Such
a statement abbreviates all the debates about ‘nature or nurture’ and the
respective balance between the two - probably different in different people.
But most churches will have some, maybe quite a few LGBT individuals or couples
who live in a society where it is fully legal for them to be married to one of
their own sex. Some of these will feel called to remain single as their way of
following Christ, but some will wish to live in a faithful loving intimate
relationship as part of how they live out their Christian discipleship.
My gay friends and I both read the same bible and are called
to inhabit the same stories. As we approach the paradigmatic story in Genesis 2
which describes the wonder of discovering our life’s partner, we both feel
drawn to the divine announcement, ‘It is not good that the man should be
alone.’ Central to the story is the need to find a life partner who will be
fully suitable to the needs of both and sustain them as they leave the parental
home and launch out on life together. At first there comes the almost comical
process of looking around at different possible partners - and for some of us that can take a long time
in reality, though all the ‘possibles’ in our list will be human! Then as I
walk in the garden and am presented with this range of possible partners – as
was Adam – I am unsatisfied until I see the other human being – the one who
became my wife – and I exclaim, ‘this at last is bone of my bones and flesh of
my flesh!’ As von Rad writes of this moment, ‘Now God himself, like the father
of the bride, leads the woman to the man. The man in supreme joy at once
recognizes the new creature as one belonging completely to him.’ (Genesis.
London.1972. p.84) For me, and for most others I know this encounter has been
one of the most thrilling of all life’s discoveries.
The main point of this story is finding someone who is equal
to our needs, the same as me, not someone who is different (like the
animals) but of the same stuff as Adam. The animals will not do - because they are
different. For most of us this deepest fulfilment will be in a human being of
the opposite sex – but that is not so for all….
Furthermore, this portion of scripture is such an important
and powerful story that it must not merely be reduced into a universal moral code
or an immutable set of ethical rules. It must also be allowed to speak afresh
to us as story. However, the uncomfortable truth is that LGBT people usually hear
interpretations of this story that say – ‘This is not for you; this is
forbidden’
But for a moment allow a gay Christian man to inhabit the
story. In terms of narrative theology, a gay person is there in the garden
asking God to find a partner for him who is fully equal to his needs. He wishes
to discover mutual support that will sustain them both as a couple through the
whole of their life’s journey together and with God. As God presents various
possible partners to him – as in the original drama - he sees all of these as
inadequate for his deepest needs. He does not recognize one who will be a soul
mate in whom depths of sexual intimacy can be found. Various young women are presented
to him and, though he wants to be friends they do not awaken in him that deep
recognition that here is one who is his partner for life. Then after a while a
man is presented to him. There is a different level of recognition and
response. This for him is the beginnings of what he has been longing for and he
exclaims, 'This at last is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh!’ They can
become one.
My hope and prayer is that more and more people will see that
there is more than one way to inhabit God’s story in the Bible. As this happens
many more will be asking the church to interpret its understanding of marriage
in a fully inclusive way - or at the very least hoping that others who disagree
will allow blessings of same sex marriages. They will hope that the church will
accept a diversity of practice - leaving two contrasting stories/interpretations
on the table to allow the dialogue to continue.
I see this approach as ‘generous orthodoxy’. It enables the
Church to offer God’s blessing to all couples who wish to make a faithful
life-long commitment in love to one another. It gives us a gospel that
proclaims God’s love equally to all.
